Ratings:
Star Rating: ★★☆☆☆
If This Book Was a Movie Rating: PG-13
Review:
“Bryony had never before had occasion to contemplate what it would be like to find oneself inside a uterus, but she suspected that sleeping in the [excessively pink] bed would be rather like that.”
Um. Wow. Yes. I too compare a massive pink bed to a uterus.
sooooo I’ve read a lot of Beauty and the Beast retellings.
This book had a high bar.
and WOW did it it fall flat.
le plot as told by the publisher cause I a lazy one.
“Bryony and her sisters have come down in the world. Their merchant father died trying to reclaim his fortune and left them to eke out a living in a village far from their home in the city.
But when Bryony is caught in a snowstorm and takes refuge in an abandoned manor, she stumbles into a house full of dark enchantments. Is the Beast that lives there her captor, or a fellow prisoner? Is the house her enemy or her ally? And why are roses blooming out of season in the courtyard?
Armed only with gardening shears and her wits, Bryony must untangle the secrets of the house before she—or the Beast—are swallowed by them.”
It’s pretty much your basic B&B retelling.
Now, I will say one thing as far as I can without spoilers: there is a little horror-esque action near the end, which some people might find kinda creepy and definitely jars with the story’s vibe up to that point. I appreciate the attempt to give the old story a new twist, but it just wasn’t it for me. AND that ending was already confusing as heck. So it really just didn't help.
The characters. All rank high on the most vanilla and forgettable character list.
Our intrepid heroine, Bryony, was meh. I did appreciate that she wasn’t a silly damsel in distress who very clearly had Stockholm Syndrome (*cough Unsightly cough*). She thought for herself, made her own decisions, and stuck to them. So she was a fine heroine, but she was missing the spark that made me actually care what happened to her. She also had a few stupidly weird moments (like the uterus comparison, no I’m not over that yet) that made me just drop my tablet, stare at my invisible cameraman, and ask “why?”
Our daring hero, Beast, was also meh. I just didn’t care. He could’ve been the long-lost second cousin of Cardan Greenbriar (❤️🔥😍 for CG) and I still wouldn’t care. The guy was just a dead bore. Maybe I was just too jaded after reading like three B&B retellings in a row, but I knew exactly was his deal was I just couldn’t bring myself to care.
with all that “meh” between them, the romance was just plain snoozeworthy.
However, for how lackluster our MCs were, I will give a congratulatory handshake to exactly two supporting characters that singlehandedly prevented this from being a one-star read.
The House and Holly.
That House is sweet and adorable and I want a house like that. I loved how the furniture moved around and lights dimmed and brightened to show the House’s emotions. Half of creativity of the entire book was poured into the House, so it was probably my favorite character of the entire thing.
Second most favorite character was most definitely Holly, sister to Bryony. She was real, sarcastic, loud, and blunt.
HA relatable.
She was actually a really good sis to Bryony, as opposed to being an entitled jerk (again, like most B&B retellings). Loved her too.
Anyways, I know a lot of people did love this book, and maybe this was just a me problem, but I just couldn’t bring myself to care about nearly anything in this book and I’m glad to finally stop writing about it lol.
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Buy this book: https://www.amazon.com/Bryony-Roses-T-Kingfisher/dp/1614503990/ref=tmm_pap_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1628974143&sr=8-1
Recommendations If You Liked This Book:
Cruel Beauty by Rosamund Hodge
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